


Some of Us Love You, Achilles

by Cosmic_Myths



Category: The Umbrella Academy (Comics), The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: F/F, Gen, Greek Mythology Allusions, Hopeful Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Angst, Most of the characters are just mentioned, Post-Canon, Post-Season/Series 02, Prime-8s, TUA Gift Exchange 2020, The Sparrow Academy (Umbrella Academy), Vanya Hargreeves Deserves Better, Vanya Hargreeves Gets a Hug, Vanya Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Vanya Hargreeves-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:01:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28323504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cosmic_Myths/pseuds/Cosmic_Myths
Summary: “Achilles, Achilles, Achilles, come down, won’t you get up off, get up off the roof? You’re scaring us and all of us, some of us love you, Achilles.” — Achilles by Gang Of YouthsLife after encountering the Sparrow Academy is hard, and Vanya fears she’s going to spiral. Luckily for her, she has her family, both here and in spirit, to help her. As it turns out, chats on the rooftop are very therapeutic.For the Umbrella Academy Gift Exchange. This is for @profjamie20 on tumblr. I hope you like it :)
Relationships: Allison Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Allison Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Harlan Cooper & Vanya Hargreeves, Klaus Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Luther Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Ben Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Vanya Hargreeves, Sissy Cooper/Vanya Hargreeves
Comments: 10
Kudos: 66





	Some of Us Love You, Achilles

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ProfJamie20](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ProfJamie20/gifts).



> A little post-season 2 thing to see how the Hargreeves(primarily Vanya) are doing in the world with the Sparrows. 
> 
> This contains a lot of hurt/comfort, and I hope everyone enjoys :)

When Vanya was younger, she poured over ancient texts that their father kept in the library. Their father made them read a few pieces of literature in the original Ancient Greek, but most of the kids didn’t really have a passion for the Greek Myths. Vanya read the Iliad, in the original Greek, countless times while her siblings were training. If she wasn’t practicing her violin, then she was probably reading up on Greek mythology. Of course, most of her siblings never noticed, but Five and Ben did. 

Ben shared her interest in literature, and together they’d read the myths together. They’d compare different versions, and sometimes Five would join them in cross referencing certain myths to see which version was more common. Five was more focused on maths and sciences, but if Ben and Vanya ranted about ancient Greece long enough, then Five would start pouring over philosophical writing from that time era. He wasn’t as passionate about it, but he did find the reads interesting. 

There was a brief time that Vanya got interested in Norse mythology while Ben became more interested in Egyptian mythology, and Five was researching the Aztecs and the Mayans, but there was something about Ancient Greece that kept pulling them back. Perhaps it was because they related to the parental issues Demigods must have had, or perhaps it was because Reginald only taught them some Greek stories as a segway to move onto Roman stories, something he favored, so they favored Greece in spite. No matter the reason, they became attached to the stories. 

The stories became a lifeline to her throughout her existence. Five was just off to fight the enemies of the gods, Ben had reached Elysium and was finally able to be at peace, and she was Homer, writing down stories for the world to see. Her favorite brothers were heroes, immortalized in the night sky by the gods, and she was the family left behind to mourn them. They’ll be remembered for ages, though. Their legend will be told alongside the stories of Theseus, Perseus, Odysseus, Heracles, Achilles, and the rest of the heroes. 

In the 60s, when she had no memories, there was a tug toward greek literature. Sissy found it endearing, and Vanya could recite lines from the Iliad to her perfectly. It was a fact in her mind. She knew it in the same way she knew the sky was blue and two plus two was four; she knew it, but she didn’t know  _ where  _ she learned it. It was similar to how Vanya could pick up on the exact beat of a song when Harlan would play a record. 

Somehow, everything has brought Vanya to a rooftop. All of the countless nights spent dreaming of escaping Reginald, all of the nights spent warning Luther to not let their father consume him like Cronus consumed his children, and all the nights spent dry swallowing pills led here. All the days she spent sharing looks with Sissy to the point that she could write a poem to rival Sappho’s, all the days she spent dancing and joking with Allison and Klaus, and all the days in the far past that she spent with Five and Ben have led here. An alternate timeline where they’re being hunted down like animals by The Sparrow Academy. An imposter wearing her dead brother’s face, Sirens promising the safety of the world in exchange for the death of a certain Umbrella Academy sibling, and the prison hidden deep in the void created by Chaos itself chases them. 

The bitter cold attaches to Vanya’s skin, and she lets the numbness envelop her body. The sky is cloudy, but the fresh air is appreciated. Neon lights from surrounding buildings dance across her vision, mixing with the small flakes of snow descending upon the earth. It’s late December, and they arrived on April 2nd. They’ve been here nearly nine months, and it’s gotten to the point that Vanya wonders if this is what insanity feels like. Worst of all, they’re separated. 

Ben _ (but he’s not really Ben because he snarls with disdain in their direction, and he can’t even recite one line of Ancient Greek text because apparently Reginald steered clear of that after Five recited the Odyssey to him) _ leads the Sparrows in their hunt for them ruthlessly, and Five has infiltrated the Academy as a spy. Except their line of contact went as cold as the winter air, and it leaves Vanya shaking with anxiety. 

Klaus and Allison have been sent to an inescapable prison which didn’t even exist in their timeline. They were taken in August, and no one’s heard from them since. Vanya hopes they’re not dead, she hopes they’re strong enough to survive, but she doesn’t know how she’ll survive if they don’t hear from them soon. Everything has become a mess, and she wonders if they would have been better off in the sixties with the lives they’d made. 

“You’re making it snow again,” A deep voice calls out. 

Vanya snorts and shakes her head, but there’s a bitter undertone to the sound. 

“So what?” She asks. “Snow is normal in December. I think this is the least of our problems, Diego.” 

Diego shrugs and sits beside her. His hair is shorter and choppier than it was in the sixties, and a deep scar runs over his right eye. Despite the physical changes, the biggest change has to be in the way he holds himself. They’ve changed a lot in these nine months. They’re heroes—Diego is a hero, but the entire world seems to think differently. Them being here supposedly endangers the world, and the Sparrow Academy has officially declared them Super Villains. Vanya wonders how Diego is handling the information; she knows his main focus has always been helping people. However, as time moves on, it seems like their morality is moving toward the grey side, but as long as they get to their original timeline, everything they do in this one will be overwritten anyway. 

“How are you holding up?” He asks. 

Vanya takes a deep breath. That is the question that she can’t seem to entirely answer. It feels like she’s lost her childhood best friends  _ again _ , and the rest of the family is so fragmented that she wonders if they’ll be able to pick up the pieces. The love of her life has slipped away, and she wants to tear down the doors of the Sparrow Academy herself and really cause the Apocalypse as a way to pay them back. She is Achilles who’s lost her Patroculus,  _ everyone _ she loves, and she’s ready to unleash the power buzzing beneath her skin to tear down the walls of those who took Patroclus from her. She left Sissy and Harlan to come  _ here _ ?! The Sparrow Academy has taken four of her siblings, and she’s still able to do  _ nothing?!  _ If not for the intervention of the gods, or Diego and Luther in this case, she would have torn down the walls of Troy _ (The Sparrow Academy) _ long ago. 

But how is she to put this into words? How is she supposed to tell him that pieces of her soul have been ripped away from her, and she has been left to organize the few pieces left? How is she supposed to tell him that she spent years of her life thinking of Five and Ben in a better place, only to now know they’re in the clutches of Reginald, and Ben has been corrupted by the man that used to be their father. How is she supposed to explain that she can still feel the volts of electricity coursing through her body as she was  _ tortured _ in the FBI building, and how is she supposed to explain that she fears Allison and Klaus are going through worse? She can’t explain this, so instead she just follows Diego’s example. She shrugs. 

“Where’s Luther?” She asks instead. 

He frowns at her blatant subject change. Her resolve doesn’t waver, and the two of them have spent enough time together for him to  _ know _ that she won’t back down. Sadly, this means Vanya knows him well enough to know he’ll drop it briefly, but it will be brought up again soon. At the very least, she’ll take the short break to gather her thoughts. 

“He’s getting supplies,” Diego answers.

Warning bells go off in her head. If they’re alone, they’re vulnerable. It takes every bit of self control that Vanya has to stop her powers from rippling outward from her; the Sparrows have sensors for this sort of thing, as they’d painfully found out. Instead, she attempts to take deep, measured breaths so that she doesn’t scream at Diego. 

“You let him go alone? Are You Crazy?! He could be KILLED out there, Diego!” 

She’s seething. Her powers are in check, but she is  _ seething.  _ She’s already lost enough siblings.  _ They _ have already lost enough siblings, and she can’t understand why Diego thought it would be a good idea to let Luther go out  _ alone _ . Did Theseus traverse the labyrinth alone? The answer is no. Being alone leaves people vulnerable, and a deep unease settles in Vanya’s stomach at the knowledge that Luther could be in danger without backup. 

“He’ll be fine. There’s a small store at the end of the street. He’ll be okay.” 

Vanya shakes her head at Diego’s words. He’s out on his own, and there’s no way they could know if he was in danger. The cube could swoop in at any moment and transport him to Hotel Oblivion to join Klaus and Allison, and then their little group would be brought down to two. She can’t allow them to lose Luther; she can’t let him fall into their father’s hands again. She’d failed Luther once before, and she wasn’t prepared to fail him again.

When she was 17, everyone had left the house except for her and Luther. First it was Klaus, mere weeks after Ben’s funeral, and Diego followed close behind only a month after Ben’s funeral. Allison left three months later to Hollywood, and then it was just Vanya and Luther. Vanya still left the lights on, and she and Luther still rarely spoke, but it was on their 17th birthday that she truly recognized the situation for what it was. 

They were the only ones left. They were going to rot away in that house forever if they didn’t leave soon, and Vanya would not let that happen. She had to go off to college like she so often talked about with Five and Ben. She knew she had to get out, and she knew Luther had to get out as well. Being alone in this house would suffocate Luther—it was already suffocating the both of them, even if he couldn’t see that. 

So, with the early morning sun shining through the window, to the tune of their mother’s steady hums as she did the dishes, Vanya gathered the courage to speak to Luther. Their birthday was the one day of the year they got off, thanks to their mother’s and Pogo’s insistence, and Vanya was going to use the opportunity to talk to Luther without their father breathing down their necks as he stared at their every move with disapproval. 

She’d warned him that staying here would break his soul. She told him of Sisyphus’ punishment to push a boulder up a hill for eternity, and she warned Luther that he’d become the same until he was eventually crushed by their father’s expectations. He didn’t listen. He didn’t listen, but Vanya didn’t try hard enough either. She left it without trying harder to convince him, and she left in the middle of the night without a single word. 

This time can be different. In this strange, altered version of their reality, she has a chance to save Luther from the threat of their father. She can’t just let Diego send him out without backup. She can’t just let either of them put themselves into danger alone. They’re her brothers, and she’s not going to let them get injured because of her. 

“You should have gone with him,” She says distantly as she shuffles to be slightly further away from Diego. 

He snorts, and for the life of her she can’t understand what could be funny about this situation.

“To leave you alone? A bit hypocritical, don’t you think?” 

She can practically hear him raising his eyebrow, and it takes all her willpower to not smile in response. Through their months spent together, Diego knows all of Vanya’s little quirks, and he knows how to get a reaction out of her and how to cheer her up. Vanya is very stubborn, though, and she wants him to know that she thinks he made the wrong call. 

“So?” She mumbles halfheartedly. “Maybe he’s worth more than me.” 

Of course, Diego just had to hear her, as shown by his soft “what?” 

She ignores his words, and instead she lets her eyes wander. They land on a pack of cigarettes in his front pocket, and it’s her turn to raise an eyebrow. She hasn’t seen him smoke at all, and the pack is unopened, so she can’t help but wonder what sparked this recent development. He notices her stare. He opens the pack and holds it out to her with a question swimming in his eyes. 

She takes one and holds her other hand out expectantly. A lighter is placed in her hand. It’s light, and the weight is achingly familiar. Her hands move on their own as she places the cigarette in her mouth and lights it. The light of the flame flickers into her vision for the briefest of moments, but it’s enough to let a flurry of emotions to spark in her. 

The smoke fills her lungs, and she barely stops herself from coughing. She hasn’t done this since she was with Sissy in the barn, and it’s not exactly a feeling she enjoys. The smoke suffocates her and chokes her. It’s definitely not something she likes to experience often, though she’s very stressed right now, so she thinks she’ll make an exception. If she tries hard enough, she can imagine that the squeeze of her chest is caused by smoking and not by the fear of the future. 

Diego’s staring at her, his cigarette still not even in his mouth, and he seems to have been whisked a million miles away. For a small moment filled with unrivaled terror, Vanya thinks the Sparrow Academy might have another way to fight against them—she thinks they might have a way to get into their heads. Shortly after the panic seizes her, Diego chuckles and shakes his head, and Vanya lets herself relax. 

“I haven’t seen you smoking since…” He trails off, but Vanya already knows what he’s talking about. 

Memories of a time when the taste of nicotine and teenage rebellion was in her mouth lingers in her mind. She remembers a short time, after Five’s disappearance but before Ben’s death, when she momentarily left the violin behind in favour of electric guitar and guttural lyrics. Of course, she still spent time with Ben in the library, the remnants from the trio never forgotten, but he didn’t share her new found taste in music. Diego did. Ben was oh so supportive, but it was her and Diego who turned their eyes into a spotlight. 

The blinding lights of glory that they sought was vastly different than the kind Allison had dreamed of. Their lights lacked any sort of fake glamour and elegance, and instead it contained the harsh truth and bitter angst left behind after years of abuse. It was a statement against their father. Leather jackets and ripped jeans filled their existence. Vanya couldn’t cut her hair, their father would have been outraged, but she could style it perfectly. With makeup and pre-show jitters, Vanya and Diego had performed their pain out to the world. 

They were going to get out of the house. They were going to go on tour, and Vanya had convinced Ben to come because even though they’re not supposed to choose favorite siblings, she still did, and Ben was her favorite brother still with her. She needed her best friend, and of course Klaus would come as well because they needed a costume designer. Allison would go off to Hollywood instead because that’s where she belonged, and Luther was supposed to follow her like a lost puppy because it was never a secret that they were each other’s favorites. 

She waited for them. She waited, and waited, but they never showed. It left a bitter taste in her mouth, but it was nothing compared to how she felt when she learned what happened. On their way there, a mission was called. Klaus, Diego, and Ben were already in street clothes, and they didn’t have time to change. When Vanya finally went home after giving up on waiting, she learned that Ben never came back from that mission. He died in a hoodie and the leather jacket they’d stolen, and the silence between the family became unbearably loud. 

“You never answered my question.” Diego’s voice breaks her from the vicious cycle of regret. “Either of them.”

“Lucky for you, they seem to go hand in hand.” 

Smoke fills her lungs once more, but at this point she can’t take it, so she just puts the cigarette out. Her fingers are cold from holding it, and she quickly stuffs her hands back into her pockets. Winter can be an unforgiving season, but she’s not going to be defeated by cold weather of her own making. 

She sighs and watches as her warm breath merges with the cold atmosphere, and she ignores the snowflakes falling into her eyes. She tries to think of how she could put her thoughts into words. How does she explain that everything she’s ever done has led up to where she is today, and how does she explain that she thinks this was unavoidable. She’s never been one to believe in fate, but maybe the three fates do exist after all, and maybe her plans and theirs just don’t line up. 

“I don’t think I’m a good person, Diego.” 

Everything points to it. Every snapped sneak of her nannies which left families to mourn without truly being able to know what caused the death of a precious family member led here. All of her cutting words as she hurt her own family with an autobiography made by someone who was bitter and jaded led here. The blood pouring out of her  _ sister’s  _ neck as she screamed out apologies led her here. Billions of lives that ended in a fiery apocalypse led here. 

“I don’t think I was ever supposed to be.” She hates the way she seems to choke out the words. 

Because she’d nearly killed her  _ sister _ . Her sister who on rare occasions would sneak into her room and Klaus’ to spend nights painting each other’s nails. Her sister, who still forgave her instantly, who  _ never _ blamed her, had still been hurt by her rage. Allison couldn’t speak for a year, and now she’s stuck in some faraway prison because Vanya keeps causing apocalypses and The Sparrows  _ know  _ it! 

She’s not a good person because she caused the apocalypse that stranded her brother for  _ forty five years.  _ Her brother who she used to make sandwiches for when she was still so blissfully unaware that it was her fault he was stuck away from them in the first place. She’s a  _ monster _ , and even though Ben told her otherwise, he still disappeared in swirling blue lights because  _ she  _ was hurting him. 

It’s not even getting better. They’re doing more and more to ensure their survival, even though her family could easily be spared if they just handed over the person who, in their eyes and hers, is doomed to cause another apocalypse. Her entire family would be fine if they just agreed to kill her. Instead, they refuse, and they have to steal to survive, and their moral alignments are turning more and more gray as their sole focus becomes their family and the people they care about as opposed to the safety of the entire world. Vanya wonders if Five felt this way when his moral alignment was centered around the safety of his family, or maybe that had always been Five’s first priority. Vanya wonders if she’ll ever know—she wonders if she’d even have the courage to ask if given the chance. 

“You know, if you killed me, maybe you could reach Elysium as the heroes who saved the world.” 

“Bullshit!” 

She focuses on Diego, and she just sees pure hurt on his face. He looks like she stabbed him with one of his own knives, and it makes Vanya feel oddly guilty. He shuffles closer to her until he can grab her shoulders. He turns her and looks her straight in the eye while he squeezes her shoulders so tight that his knuckles turn white. She just sees raw emotion in his eyes. 

“We’re trying to s-survive! Th-that d-doesn’t make us b-bad p-people! And even… even if it did, I d-don’t give a f-fuck! You’re my s-sister, w-we’re f-f-family, and that m-means w-we l-look out f-for each other!” 

He takes a deep breath, and concentrates in a way that Vanya can only assume means he’s picturing the word in his mind like their mother taught him to all those years ago. Vanya can already feel her throat clogging up, and there’s a dull stinging forming in her eyes from his words. She won’t let herself cry, but she can’t deny the way Diego’s words make her feel a storm of emotions whose names have long been forgotten by the Hargreeves. 

“W-we’re Team Zero!” 

She laughs. She laughs, and she leans into Diego because, even if she still feels like shit, at least she has her brother by her side. She has Five, who’s infiltrated an enemy group just for them, and who always quoted The Iliad in perfect Greek with her. She has Klaus and Allison who spent time playing with her hair, and who danced with her in a barber shop back in the 60s. She has Luther who’s caring and remorseful for his mistakes, and who does his best to keep his family safe. She has the memory of Sissy’s blonde curls and eyes which sparked to life when their gazes met. She has the memory of Harlan whose soul was kinder than words can describe. She has Diego who was distant to her in childhood, fighting against the world with her as teenagers, full of bitter resentment and hostility in their early adult years, and who now takes the time to comfort her because she knows he  _ loves  _ her as much as she loves him. Their family may have started out more dysfunctional than the Olympians, but they’ve gotten so much better.

“Hell yeah we are,” She whispers softly. 

There’s a beat of silence. The air is filled with the soft breaths of the siblings, the steady symphony of the city, and the Christmas carols being played from every shop and every car. The snow continues, but it’s lighter and joyful. Most people may not put emotions to weather, but when Vanya makes it, she can feel her mood being reflected into each and every snowflake. The cold is still biting, but the warmth from her brother is enough to keep her satisfied for now. 

“I have good news to tell you,” He says. 

“Yeah?” She asks. 

He nods, and she can feel his head move against hers. The embrace is awkward, and she has to be mindful of all of his nice, but she feels safe to the point that she’s not sure she wants to move. They’ve been hurt so much throughout their lives, and she thinks they deserve to just sit here and be at peace. Of course, the fact that there’s good news makes the entire situation better. She wonders if this is how people felt when Jason returned with the Golden Fleece, or when news of the death of Medusa reached the public. She wonders if they felt the same joy and anticipation clashing together. 

“Five got Allison and Klaus out. That’s why he was so silent for a couple months—he couldn’t risk being discovered. We’ll be able to rendezvous with them in a couple of days.” 

The emotions of relief that crash over Vanya is almost too much for her to handle. She opens her mouth in shock, and the slightest breeze moves around her and Diego. She hopes it’s not enough for the Sparrow’s sensors to pick up on. She can’t be bothered with that because her siblings are alive, and she may not know what traumatizing events they’ve experienced there, and they may not know what she, Diego, and Luther have been through—she’s sure questions about Diego’s eye will be asked—but she knows they’ll be able to get through it as a family. 

“That’s great news. That— I can’t begin to describe how happy I am,” She says truthfully. 

“I know. I feel the same. I know,” Diego answers. 

Everything is peaceful for a few glorious minutes while Chronos, not to be confused with Cronus, takes pity on them and grants them time. Eventually, the sound of the door to their room opening causes them to become alert, but the familiar gait of Luther calms Vanya, and when she relaxes, Diego does as well. She can hear the fridge opening, she can hear the shuffling of groceries, and she can practically hear Luther’s confusion as to where they are. 

“Uh, guys?” She hears him call out hesitantly. “I bought Christmas lights as well.” 

A grin breaks out on Vanya’s face, and she and Diego finally pull apart. His eyes are tinged red, much like she expects hers are, but she doesn’t comment on it. They both glance at the window to their room which is no doubt letting a cold breeze in. She decides to take one last look around. She watches as the lights in the store across the street flicker off, and she watches pedestrians walk by in winter coats. Even if they’re labeled enemies to the entire population, she still finds beauty in the world. 

“Hey Vanya?” Diego calls, and when she looks, she sees that he’s already made his way to the window. “Even if you  _ are  _ somehow a bad person, then you’re my favorite one.” 

She smiles at his statement, and she can’t prevent the next words from stumbling out of her mouth. “Thank you. I love you.” 

“I love you too.” 

Those words aren’t said enough, there’s no way they could ever be said enough times to make up for the years that went by without them, but for now this is enough. She still has problems, she still has trauma, and she’s still dealing with some issues centered around how she sees herself, but she’s healing. She hasn’t lost more of her siblings, and Diego’s words are enough to drop a blanket of ease around her. The battle is far from over, but for now, this is enough. 

This is enough. 


End file.
